How to Test Your Stress

Stress is the new era’s worst disease. It is estimated that over 90% of all illnesses are caused or worsened by stress. In the future, you may find yourself dedicating most of your energy to overcoming stress. Stress management is a lifelong journey and everything little thing you do can help.

There are many ways to test your stress level. I personally like rating it on a scale of 1 to 10. For any of my coaching clients, I recommend a stress review every three month to make. This helps them make sure they are progressing (or at least helps them find out if their situation is getting worse). The issue with stress is that you start noticing it when it gets out of control. Regular monitoring when things are going well can be critical. It allows you to find a benchmark that you can compare to. If things go a little sour, you can do something straight away before you find yourself in a mental health ward with a nervous breakdown.

Read How to Test Your Stress »

12 Practical Ways to Parent Sore Losers

It is no wonder most of us are such sore losers. Winning is easy and losing is not. Let’s face it, regardless their age, no one likes to lose. Even the word “losing” sounds devastating.

Unfortunately, parents who are sore losers tend to raise kids who are sore losers. So, what can we do to make sure losing is not so devastating? What’s the best approach to parenting sore losers?

When I had my early childhood center, we stopped using the word “losing”. We replaced it with words like learning, opportunities, testing, growing and evolving. It does not sound like much but it worked well for the kids. It takes away a lot of the heartache and pain.

Read 12 Practical Ways to Parent Sore Losers »

How to Be a Great Teacher (U to Z)

I love teaching. I think teaching is my calling and I know that many teachers feel the same. Over the years, I have collected effective philosophy and teaching tips and am happy to share some with you. In this last post in How to Be a Great Teacher, here are the tips from U to Z.

Use your space creatively rather than in the old fashioned way. A classroom needs to feel cozy and fun so that kids do not wait impatiently for the bell to ring so they can run away. Even if your classroom is small, be creative. You can make palaces out of any sized class. The students can feel like they are kings, queens, knights and princesses. You can tell whether you classroom decoration is good by the reaction of the kids from other rooms, by the fact that your students make sure their parents come to see it and by noticing that you need to encourage your students to go outside and play with their friends.

Read How to Be a Great Teacher (U to Z) »

How to Model Empathy to Your Kids

Mother showing empathy to her daughter with a hug

Empathy is a very important emotional skill. As parents and teachers, it’s our role to teach our children empathy. Although some people have a natural tendency to be more understanding and empathetic toward others, our role is to promote empathy in all children.

Regardless of their natural starting point, children can all improve their ability to put themselves in another person’s shoes. This will help them build better relationships.

A person’s level of empathy can tell us a lot about a person’s emotional intelligence. If they are more empathetic, they’re usually more confident. If you can be empathetic, it usually means you feel good enough about yourself to be able to share it with others.

Read How to Model Empathy to Your Kids »

The Art of Listening: Things to Watch Out For

To conclude The Art of Listening series, here are some tips on things to watch out for in deciding which listening style to adopt.

In previous posts, I covered situations when it is hard to listen, types of listening and how to become good listeners. However, putting all this into practice means you need to know when it is appropriate to adopt one style over another. There are some things to watch out for in making that decision.

Be a kind listener when:
1. The speaker is angry or in a bad mood.
2. The speaker feels judged or stressed.
3. When you want to please the listener or need something from him/her.

Read The Art of Listening: Things to Watch Out For »

The Art of Listening: How to Listen

To wrap up our the “The Art of Listening” series , here are some great tips on how to become a better listener.

To start off, we discussed 10 situations that turn off the listening switch and make it harder to keep engaged. In the previous post, I shared four listening types: the kind listener, the empathetic listener, the critical listener and the solution focused listener.

In this post, I will share ideas of how to become a kind listener, an empathetic listener, a critical listener and a solution focused listener and how to use each of these listening styles when appropriate.

Read The Art of Listening: How to Listen »

How to Overcome Shyness: Extra Tips

In this final post of How to Overcome Shyness, I have added a few more tip to help you and your child.

If strangers are your greatest fear, practice. Conquer your fear by starting conversations with total strangers. Say something to the bus driver or the supermarket cashier. You will conquer your feelings by feeling the fear and doing it anyway. Take the risk. It gets easier after.

If your need to control things causes you to be shy, try letting go of your attachment to the outcome. Give it a go and wait to see what will happen. Accept things as they are. “Whatever will, be will be”.

If your shyness comes from a fear of being hurt by someone you trust, try opening up slowly. Share something small with someone. Take small risks of self exposure. Most people will share a similar sized ‘something’. If you are a parent helping a child, expose yourself first to encourage your child to do the same.

Read How to Overcome Shyness: Extra Tips »

The Art of Listening: Listening Types

Listening is an essential part of every relationship. But not everybody listens in the same way. In this chapter of the Art of Listening, I want to introduce you to the different types of listening.

In the previous chapter, I covered 10 situations that make it hard for people to keep listening. In this chapter, I will explain the four listening types: the kind listener, the empathic listener, the critical and the solution focused listener.

The kind listener is very supportive, encouraging and always on your side. They are best friends and always manage to interpret whatever you say in a positive light. They won’t challenge you because their aim is to make you feel good, valued and cared for.

Kind listeners are easy to be around. They are generally loyal and trustworthy and are very good conversation companions. Their relationships are usually better and last longer. Empathic listening is an important tool for being good parents.

Read The Art of Listening: Listening Types »

How to Overcome Shyness: Tips

Being shy can be pretty debilitating. And surprisingly, most people have experienced it at least once in their lives. In this part of “How to Overcome Shyness”, I want to share some tips with you on overcoming shyness.

We know from part one that there are three types of shyness: situational shyness (in specific situations), transitional shyness (during transitions or the process of change), and permanent shyness (in most social situations).

In the last post, I covered the four main causes of shyness: need for control, lack of trust, fear of being judged and being critical.

Now that we know the what and why behind shyness, I want to share some tips with you on how to overcome it. If you have kids, escort them in this exercise and help them practice the tips. You may have to be their facilitator.

Read How to Overcome Shyness: Tips »

How to Overcome Shyness: Causes of Shyness

In the previous shyness post, I explained about the three types of shyness: situational shyness (in specific situations), transitional shyness (during transitions or change) and permanent shyness (pretty much in all social situations).

To be able to overcome our shyness, we need to understand the reasons behind it. Here are the four main reasons why shyness occurs:

The first is a need for control. Shyness can start when people feel like they are outside their comfort zone. People who experience this kind of shyness usually know what is socially acceptable in certain situations, they ask questions to be sure, and they are good at thinking on their feet. These people prefer to talk about their strengths and things within their comfort zone, they are well prepared and like consistency. When things are unclear, unpredictable, or when someone pressures them, they worry and become anxious because they lose their sense of control.

Read How to Overcome Shyness: Causes of Shyness »