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Home » assumptions

assumptions Tag

Posts tagged 'assumptions'

Reasons: The Search for Cause and Effect

A row of dominos with a hand in the middle stopping them from continuing to fall

I often hear that finding the reasons for things we do is the way to have a happy life. There are many public claims that understanding why we do things cures bad decisions and is the way to contentment.

However, it is important to distinguish between the search for a reason and finding a reason. Searching for a reason is a continuous state of limbo, based on the belief there is one true reason for something. Finding a reason is just an illusion that the reason we found is the one true reason.

There is a big challenge in searching for the one reason, mainly because most of our decision making (in fact, more than 90%) is done by our subconscious mind, which means we are not aware of it. We only know of 10% of it.

Our conscious mind can process a limited number of thoughts and memories, so it is unlikely to lead us to the “right” reason, or right decision. At the same time, our subconscious mind can process millions of thoughts and memories in a split second. We can never hope to be aware of everything that goes on “down there”.

So in humans, the concept of cause and effect is not that simple. There is no single cause that will lead to the same effect.

Read Reasons: The Search for Cause and Effect »

July 28, 2016 by Ronit Baras In: Personal Development Tags: assumptions, emotional intelligence, choice, control, happiness, interpretation, decision making, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, behavior / discipline, personal development / personal growth / personality development / self improvement

Ronit Celebrating Diversity by Challenging Teachers’ Cultural Thinking

Teacher and elementary classroom

As teachers, we like to think of ourselves as very open-minded. We model this attitude and believe that open-minded teachers can raise open-minded students and when the mind is open, the possibilities are endless. Together with our students’ parents, we are the most important social agents in our society. Our best tool is to believe and be true to what we want to create. If we want to raise a whole generation of open-minded kids who are accepting, appreciating and celebrating diversity, we must first be living proof of what we want to teach and be able to ‘walk the talk’.

The first time I questioned my own open-mindedness was long before I became a teacher. I was 16 years old, and Israel and Egypt signed their famous peace contract. To start the official ‘relationship’ between the two countries, it was decided to send selected youth from both sides to meet each other. As a very ‘open-minded’ teen, I was chosen to be part of this unique delegation.

The Egyptian teens came to visit us in Israel. We had a great time together and one evening, the Israeli teens decided to visit the Egyptian teens in their room to see what they were doing. We knocked on the door and they were very happy to see us. They welcomed us in and we sat in one of the rooms and just watched them. We were completely shocked.

Why shocked? you might ask.

Because they acted like… teens. Same as us. They were listening to the same music we were listening to, their boys ‘hit on girls’, just like ours did, and their girls responded in exactly the same coy way as ours did. I vividly remember the question that popped into my head ‘What were you expecting?’

Read Ronit Celebrating Diversity by Challenging Teachers’ Cultural Thinking »

July 27, 2015 by Ronit Baras In: Education / Learning Tags: values, role model, beliefs, change, society, k-12 education, attitude, cultural, diversity, leadership, school, assumptions

Moving House Made Easy: Telling the Kids

Snail with house on back saying: we are moving

One major challenge of moving houses is telling the kids about it. Most parents are afraid to do this. They wonder when the right time will be to share the information with the kids and how to do it.

If you have young kids, do not tell them about the move a long time in advance.

Children’s perception of time is not sophisticated enough yet and they will just be anxious. As soon as you tell your kids that the move is on, they begin to deal emotionally by saying goodbye to the people and things around them (this is a coping mechanism we all have to manage). As a result, kids who are about to move away are often not invited to parties. People around them do not invest in their relationships any more.

This happens to adults as well…

This post is part 3 of 13 in the series Moving House Made Easy

Read Moving House Made Easy: Telling the Kids »

July 15, 2014 by Ronit Baras In: Kids / Children, Parenting, Home Tags: friends / friendship, emotions, how to, feeling, trust, thought, separation, assumptions, happiness, guilt, perception, practical parenting / parents, positive, kids / children, home / house, communication, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, success

The Art of Listening: How to Listen

Listen more, talk less

To wrap up our the “The Art of Listening” series , here are some great tips on how to become a better listener.

To start off, we discussed 10 situations that turn off the listening switch and make it harder to keep engaged. In the previous post, I shared four listening types: the kind listener, the empathetic listener, the critical listener and the solution focused listener.

In this post, I will share ideas of how to become a kind listener, an empathetic listener, a critical listener and a solution focused listener and how to use each of these listening styles when appropriate.

This post is part 3 of 3 in the series The Art of Listening

Read The Art of Listening: How to Listen »

December 19, 2013 by Ronit Baras In: Personal Development, Relationships / Marriage Tags: questions, tips, focus, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, emotional intelligence, friends / friendship, how to, personal development / personal growth / personality development / self improvement, change, empathy, motivation, assumptions, relationships / marriage, listening, social, positive

Teaching & Education Beliefs: Caring

Education

Previously on Teaching & Education Beliefs, I wrote it was the last set of beliefs, but they were not. Sorry. Today’s beliefs are. Here are the last 20 of my top 100 beliefs about teaching and education.

All kids are gifted. Every child has some talent or skill. Teachers are there to help them develop and excel in it. But remember, numeracy and literacy skills are not the only gifts available and they are not great predictors of excellence in the future.

Kids’ hobbies are very important for their emotional intelligence, more than their academic success. Encourage kids to have hobbies, share yours with them, introduce them to different people with different hobbies and give a stage in class to share theirs.

This post is part 6 of 6 in the series Teaching & Education Beliefs

Read Teaching & Education Beliefs: Caring »

July 4, 2013 by Ronit Baras In: Education / Learning Tags: academic performance, special education, questions, responsibility, kids / children, emotional intelligence, behavior / discipline, language, education / learning, beliefs, wisdom, hobbies, learning styles, assumptions, intelligence, evaluation, self-fulfilling prophecy, teaching / teachers, k-12 education

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