Posts tagged 'practical parenting / parents'
There is a point in every parent’s journey where you ask yourself, “Why do I send my kids to school?” Over the last 33 years, I’ve worked with many parents. And I can tell you that most of them didn’t have a good answer to this question.
Have you ever reached this point in your parenting?
What was your answer?
Parenting is one of the most important and difficult things we’ll ever do in life. And it becomes even harder when we doubt ourselves and stop trusting our own judgment. When others try to impose their methods of parenting on us, and we let it affect us, we have an even greater challenge.
I was lucky to start my parenting journey when our close friends didn’t have children and our family was too far away. Until our daughter Eden was 14 months old, Gal and I relied solely on our own judgment. We had no Internet and no people telling us what to do.
Eden was born after I finished most of my education studies. Although my course didn’t cover things like the best time to feed babies, or when to start giving solid food, it did help me build the confidence to raise her.
Read Practice Fearless Parenting Under Pressure: Do It Your Way »
Being a parent is one of the biggest challenges a person ever experiences. Being a stepparent is even harder. If every family needs goals, blended families need them even more.
Think of a family like a ship. Parents are the captains of the ship, and as captains, we need to make sure our family arrives at its destination safely. In every sea, there are storms and calm waters, and we need to prepare ourselves for every ride.
What do ships need in order to move? They need two coordinates. They need to know where they are and where they are going. Without them, we don’t know how much supplies to take, what direction to take, what to avoid and where to stop on the way to have some fun.
Read How to Motivate Your Stepchildren: A Stepparent’s Guide »
Many parents stress about what their children choose to study and/or their career. So much so, that they fail to support their children in making the right career choice.
I didn’t know this was such an issue until my friends heard that my daughter wanted to be an actor. Almost immediately, everyone told me I should talk her out of it. I then realized that what children chose to study was an issue for many parents.
I guess I was lucky. I chose to study something my parents approved of, so no one ever said anything about it. Neither one of my parents had gone to higher education, so I was the first one to study. Everyone was just thrilled about it.
Recently, I had an opportunity to correspond with one of my readers who found treasures in my blog. She managed to change her life and the life of her family just by following some of my practical tips.
I was very happy, grateful and honored to read her letters. I hope that bringing them here will help you too. Consider your own attitude towards body, mind and gratitude.
I’ve changed the reader’s name to respect her privacy, but left everything else in the letters as it was.
Read Exciting Letters from a Reader: Body, Mind and Gratitude »
Over 20 years ago, people said to me that books were going to be a thing of the past. The prediction that we would no longer see any printed newspaper or book was devastating for me, because my desire to be an author and a journalist just didn’t seem right without them.
When I heard that, I grieved the lost experience of touching books, taking my kids to the library, smelling the printed paper and sitting in the kids’ corner, reading, enjoying the moment and imagining we are in a different world. Inside, I prayed it wouldn’t happen. At least, I prayed it wouldn’t happen too quickly.
I think my wish came true.
As a parent, I hear the word “boring” a lot. I also heard it a lot as a teacher. There are two main reasons kids use the word “boring”:
1. They say “boring” instead of “hard” when they want to hide their difficulties.
2. They want to manipulate their parents and put pressure on them.
Today, I would like to talk about the reasons and solutions for the second type of motivation.
Children learn at an early age that their parents find the word “boring” painful. They know their parents feel uncomfortable when they hear it, so it becomes a “button” to press. This happens when the parents see themselves as being in charge of their children’s entertainment.
I am sure you have heard many mothers say that they can’t leave their babies on their own for 2 seconds. Those babies grow up to be kids who can’t entertain themselves, and later on, they become adults who can’t entertain themselves.
Every parent wants their child to be gifted and talented. We want our kids to be able to manage themselves throughout the challenges of the education process, which takes between 13 and 18 years. My kids have done that, and people who know them often ask, “What have you done to raise such gifted and talented children?”
Recently, I was at an event, where my son Tsoof performed a piece he had written in front of hundreds of people. After the event, some people came to me to congratulate me for his successful performance, and I stood there like a peacock, as if I had played it myself. It felt great, but the real benefit of playing music was in the development of his brain.
I specialize in children with learning difficulties, as well as gifted and talented children. After studying and doing Special Education work for many years, I developed methods to make sure my kids wouldn’t develop learning difficulties, and if they did, to get rid of them quickly (I am a great believer in the plasticity of the brain). But beyond that, I used these methods to make them gifted and talented.
Why? Because life is easier that way.
Believe it or not, if you make your bed in the morning, it will make your day. You’ll be happier, clearer and more productive. There’s research showing it’s true.
I have been on a search for family tips from the moment I had children. Almost 30 years ago, becoming a mother made me realize that efficiency can help me a lot in managing work and home, and that being efficient gave me more time with my kids.
As parents, we need to choose how to balance our time across many important things. Slowly, we tend to let go of some things we care about for other things we find more important.
In my leadership training, I emphasize that life is not hard when we need to choose between things that are very important and things that are less important. That’s an easy choice! It is much harder to choose between things that are equally important to us. When children appear, we have to do that a lot, and that’s not easy.
The family quotes in this post were written by Virginia Satir, the mother of Family Therapy. I appreciate her and have learned a lot from her over the years, and some of her best quotes hang where I can read them again and again.
Virginia Satir’s quotes about family and her philosophy about family relationships have become a great compass for me. I would like to share them with you and inspire you to consider and adopt her ideas about family.
One of the reasons I enjoyed Virginia Satir’s work was that she started as an educator, and so did I. I have a soft spot for people who are educators as, because I think their spin on their work is different and more effective.
Motivating Kids From: $9.95 
Reflections From: $5.99 
In the Outback with Jasmine Banks From: $5.99 
Be Special, Be Yourself for Teenagers From: $5.99 
The Will From: $5.99 
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