Teen Birthday Parties: Who Needs Them Anyway?

Teen girl blowing out candles on a cake at a birthday party

It was the third birthday our daughter had refused to celebrate with friends. For her 17th birthday, she invited a couple of girls to go out for a movie. For her 18th birthday, she spent the day crying because it was her grandmother’s funeral (and her dad was away to attend).

When she approached her 19th birthday, we had the same discussions about a party all over again.

When I was kid, most of the kids wanted to have a party, at least on their birthdays. Only the “rich” kids could have parties every year. Some rare kids had parties more than once a year and those were obviously the most popular.

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Proud as a Peacock

My daughter is celebrating her 19th birthday this week. It is an exciting time for us both. Can you imagine? 19 years!

Sometimes, when I try to remember her crawling on the floor or saying her first words (which was early, very early), I have only vague memories.

She is so big now (she is taller than me, but that is easy), yet she is still young and acts like a child. She is so mature, yet she is naïve.

Our kids’ birthdays are a wonderful way for us to take stock of our parenting. Every year, they grow and mature and learn about themselves, we do too. We learn about our achievements or our challenges and it makes us better people, better parents.

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Interview with an Author

Be Special, Be Yourself for Teenagers by Ronit Baras

Find the answers to all the good questions I was asked about my first teen book “Be Special, Be Yourself for Teenagers”.

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Heroes

We all like watching “Heroes” on TV and reading books about strong or creative people who have done things others did not expect them to do. Hearing, reading about or meeting such people is very motivating. Heroism is the courage to face fears, therefore fear and heroes go together.

Fear is a basic human emotion that works like a survival instinct. In a sense, fear helps protect us from danger, though it has reached a point where we see danger even in places where it does not exist.

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How to Fill Your Love Tank

It was a very open discussion. Parents talked about their own experiences regarding physical touch. Most were above the age of 40. They talked about living as kids in a society that had discouraged physical expressions like hugs and kisses as soon as kids became teens.

Some talked about coming from cultures where fathers shook hands with their kids. One mother said her teen did not like her hugging and kissing him, especially around others. Then, another mother, let’s call her Maggie, who was there by herself, raised her hand and asked a question:

“I understand the importance of hugs, but I find it hard to hug my daughter. What can I do?”

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Knowledge or Attitude?

For many years, knowledge was considered to be the ultimate factor for success in life. Many parents and educators still pump knowledge into kids’ brains, in hope this will bring kids to the desired achievements.

While in the past knowledge was something not all people could have, nowadays it is much more accessible. Unfortunately, knowledge is not the thing that will give kids the edge to succeed.

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How Do You Force a 17-Year-Old Boy to Go to School?

It is common belief that teens have to finish school in order to succeed in life, but that is not true. Sometimes, leaving school is the best thing that happens to them. For example, I was kicked out of school at the end of grade 10 and it was the best thing that happened to me. It was a strong wake-up call. In the end, I became a teacher.

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Parenting – A Rewarding Career

Applying for a parenting career requires no interviews and no application forms, though it is one of the most demanding and rewarding careers. Without the benefit of selection criteria, we discover that to be good parents, we need many skills and abilities that we do not learn at school.

Some people hope that these skills will show up in the delivery room together with their first born. Others say you either have them or you don’t. I believe that the magic of pregnancy and childbirth is not enough to make us parents and we can and should develop these skills over time.

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Music For The Mind

Did you know?

Children studying music from as early as grade 4 get to their first year of high school with an average academic score that is 11% higher than kids who did not study music.

If they continue their music studies into high school, by the time they graduate, their average academic score is 23% higher than kids who did not study music.

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Suicide Rate Is Rising. Time To Wake Up!

Teen girl's hand limp with pills spread around it

Although suicide is not a topic many people talk about, I believe it is important to discuss it BEFORE it is too late. Whereas in the past suicide was an adult concern, the trends in the last 50 years have changed and more and more teens (aged 15 and above) are at risk.

There are many reasons for suicide, some of which are related to crisis and mental breakdowns due to the loss of loved ones and others events that cannot be prevented. However, the major reason for suicide is depression. Yet unlike losing someone you love, depression can be prevented!

Suicide is one of those things that when it happens, it is already too late. Therefore, we, as parents and educators (and government), must take responsibility and dedicate ourselves to preventing suicide.

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