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Home » practical parenting / parents » Page 5

Resilient Teens: Bend or Break!

Teenage girl in devil costume peeking shyly behind a post

“Teens today have an easy life” is a very common phrase. I tend to think that grownups say it because they have forgotten what it means to be a teenager. They say that teens need more discipline, more structure, more rules, more determination and more motivation. I say they need to be more resilient, because teens today have it tough and need to be able to bounce back quickly and very often. They need to bend, so they do not break.

It is easy to look at your own teenage years in retrospect, with the “creative dementia” that comes with age, and say that they were fun. People forget. We are programmed to forget the tough things in order to survive, but expecting our kids to perform where we have failed ourselves is a double standard. The reason I have not forgotten my teenage experiences was that I have been working with so many teens since then. Even if I would have forgotten naturally, they have reminded me that this period brings with it many challenges. The physical-hormonal part of adolescence is a myth that grownups have created to help them forget that the social-emotional side is where they failed.

Read Resilient Teens: Bend or Break! »

Published: April 28, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: September 4, 2023In: Teens / Teenagers, Parenting Tags: flexibility, k-12 education, teens / teenagers, parenting teens, self confidence / self esteem / self worth, practical parenting / parents, social media, emotional intelligence, how to, empowerment

The Power of Complimenting: Don’t Be Stingy

A young boy

Some parents are stingy with complimenting. I do not blame them. They probably grew up with stingy parents, who probably grew up with parents that did not compliment them either. I have said many times that we suffer today for things our ancestors did, which have not evolved.

Wake up, parents! We do not need to do the same things our great-great-grandparents did, because in some areas of life, they were not great at all. Giving compliments was definitely one of these areas.

The belief “back then” was that compliments got in the way of “building character”. I have clients and friends who say it aloud, “If you compliment people, especially children, they become complacent”.

What?!

Since when is complacent a bad word, anyway?

Read The Power of Complimenting: Don’t Be Stingy »

Published: April 5, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: August 13, 2020In: Parenting Tags: kids / children, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, behavior / discipline, emotional development, abuse, practical parenting / parents, emotional intelligence, teaching / teachers, fear, motivation, k-12 education, compassion, positive attitude tips

No More Disappointment: The Biggest Loser Leads the Dance

Teenage boy looking away

Many forms of therapy try to help the client overcome pain. One big source of pain starts during childhood, when kids, with their lack of life experience, feel that they are a disappointment to their parents. Here is the story of Simon, who believed he was the biggest loser in his parent’s eyes.

Simon was an angry and frustrated teenager when he came to sit with me on my life coaching deck. I read what he and his parents had written to me and felt frustrated to see how yet another whole family was a victim of circumstances. Parents’ love can be overwhelming sometimes and being unaware of feelings and lacking the ability to manage them sabotages the relationships at home.

Parents need courage to realize that they are the most powerful in this dysfunctional dynamic, but most of them feel helpless and send their kids to be “fixed”. A relationship with a child is a dance. Some parents do not understand that they need to lead.

This post is part 17 of 19 in the series From the Life Coaching Deck

Read No More Disappointment: The Biggest Loser Leads the Dance »

Published: March 15, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: December 26, 2019In: Parenting, Teens / Teenagers, Beautiful people Tags: beliefs, expectation, change, practical parenting / parents, Life Coaching, perception, interpretation, positive attitude tips, teens / teenagers, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, behavior / discipline, emotional intelligence, personal development / personal growth / personality development / self improvement

The Power of Bilingualism

The word Hello in multiple languages

My introduction to learning languages and bilingualism happened 24 years ago, when we moved to Texas, USA, and our daughter started to learn English. As a Special Education teacher, I knew she would be fine, but as a mother, I was scared, because at the age of 4, with the language of a 10 year old, I was afraid she would be left behind.

She wasn’t!

Since then, I have been working with inspiring people who specialize in language acquisition and with many children of migrants around the world. I have learned that parents and teachers play an important role in supporting language development. If they understand the challenges and consider the myths around language, they can help kids with healthy language acquisition.

Read The Power of Bilingualism »

Published: March 8, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: February 27, 2020In: Education / Learning, Parenting Tags: family matters, k-12 education, cultural, kids / children, education / learning, practical parenting / parents, teaching / teachers, communication, early childhood, language, generation gap

When Your Teen’s Friends are Bad Influence

A group of teenagers on Halloween costumes

As parents, we put all our heart and energy into raising our children to be the best they can be. We want them to be as healthy, friendly, successful and happy as possible. In their teen years, most of us are afraid that their friends will become the most important people in our teenager’s life. So we want to make sure those friends do not have bad influence over them.

Our investment in our children, both material and emotional, is tested several times during their life. Their social connections are one big test of parenting, because as parents, we try to pass our philosophy and values to our children. If they spend their time with friends who tell them the opposite, this may weaken their belief in our philosophy and our values.

Read When Your Teen’s Friends are Bad Influence »

Published: March 1, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: December 26, 2019In: Teens / Teenagers, Parenting Tags: acceptance / judgment / tolerance, behavior / discipline, emotional development, practical parenting / parents, how to, choice, beliefs, rules, social skills, attitude, teens / teenagers

Kids Eating Healthy Food: You Can Be This Lucky Too

Baby eating fruit

When it comes to kids’ healthy eating habits, I was lucky, because my children, all three of them, have no issues with eating healthy food. Our children eat healthy food and were never “junkies”. My youngest had a sweet tooth for a while, but as soon as she entered her teen years, with great influence of some of her friends, she switched to cherries and blueberries. I told you I was lucky!

My parents were not that fortunate. All five of their children struggled with our eating habits and with our health. Some of us still struggle as grownups today. As a child, I was on antibiotics for three months of every year until the age of 12. When we were kids, my parents spent many days with us in hospitals and clinics when we got sick.

I was in a hospital once with each of my children and it was a great reminder that I did not want to raise my children to be sick.

Food and health are strongly connected!

Read Kids Eating Healthy Food: You Can Be This Lucky Too »

Published: February 22, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: February 28, 2020In: Health / Wellbeing, Parenting Tags: practical parenting / parents, diet, home / house, how to, choice, control, change, food, eating disorders, kids / children, health / wellbeing

How to Turn off Children’s Creativity

Girl with disheveled hair looking worried

As an educator and a mother, I believe in the importance of developing children’s creativity. My first real job as an educator was in a very special project, called “Creative Thinking”. It was a very important part in my career and in forming my philosophy.

I think this is the reason creativity is such a high value for me. I have written a lot about creativity and how to “turn it on”. But today, I would like to give some negative examples of ways you can turn it off, just as easily as you can turn it on.

Please check if your relationships with your children or students include any of these things. If so, this may be limiting their creativity and future success.

Read How to Turn off Children’s Creativity »

Published: February 15, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: December 26, 2019In: Parenting, Education / Learning, Kids / Children Tags: change, k-12 education, attitude, kids / children, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, creative / creativity, focus, education / learning, success, expectation, emotional intelligence, practical parenting / parents, teaching / teachers, control

Education System on Trial and Found Guilty

Court gavel

Until I studied Education, I had not questioned the education system. I do not think I’d had the tools to question it. But by the time I graduated (in Special Education), I had realized something was wrong. It was easy to see this while working with kids who were different (both gifted and those with learning difficulties).

Why?

Because special education kids did not fit into the “education box” and the school system did not cater for them. It got worse when I realized, thanks to my amazingly wonderful teachers, that the system just did not care for any of the kids, because every child is special and different in some way. The system cared for itself.

It was devastating!

Read Education System on Trial and Found Guilty »

Published: February 9, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: November 9, 2021In: Education / Learning, Parenting Tags: acceptance / judgment / tolerance, behavior / discipline, education / learning, special education, practical parenting / parents, school, change, learning disabilities, society, k-12 education, video, academic performance

How to Stop Bullying with Empathy: The Story of Two Apples

2 apples

Bullying is an epidemic. It touches every part of our life and children are very vulnerable to bullying, because they do not have the tools to prevent it.

From the bully’s point of view, bullying is an act of fear. When the bullies feels inferior for some reason, they search for someone weak to pick on, in an attempt to feel better about themselves. Therefore, the best way to prevent bullying is to develop confidence and for children, this is still work in progress (it is work in progress for grownups too, but children are just at the beginning of this process).

What we need to change the world from bullying to respect and collaboration is empathy. As parents and educators, we can develop empathy in easy and effective ways.

This post is part 35 of 35 in the series Bullying

Read How to Stop Bullying with Empathy: The Story of Two Apples »

Published: February 2, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: March 18, 2021In: Education / Learning Tags: practical parenting / parents, school, how to, change, perception, bullying, acceptance / judgment / tolerance, self confidence / self esteem / self worth, empathy, education / learning

How to Develop Kids’ Thinking: Ask the Right Questions

Little girl meditating

Parents often ask me how to develop kids’ thinking, so that they grow up to be successful and happy. My answer is: ask the right questions.

Beliefs form the boundaries around our thinking. They separate between what we think we can and cannot do. What we believe we can do is within the boundaries of our thinking. We call these “empowering beliefs”. What we think we cannot do is outside the boundaries of our thinking. We call these “limiting beliefs”.

We are all limited in the way we think. Why? Because we do not know what we do not know. Think of the brain as a map we design from the moment we are born. We are exposed to many things and form beliefs that we use to navigate life.

Read How to Develop Kids’ Thinking: Ask the Right Questions »

Published: February 1, 2017 by Ronit Baras
Last modified: December 22, 2022In: Parenting, Education / Learning Tags: beliefs, empowerment, change, perception, k-12 education, questions, kids / children, personal development / personal growth / personality development / self improvement, education / learning, focus, practical parenting / parents, how to

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