Family MattersPractical Parenting Blog

Relationship Problems: Why You Shouldn’t Ask Why

Couple having relationship problems

Relationship problems are a natural part of life, and usually stems from either or both parties’ insecurity. Many people think that if they understand the source of a conflict, they will find a solution more easily. Sometimes, asking “Why?” helps, but often, it can cause more harm than good.

Why?

Because “Seek and you shall find”. When someone asks us a question, we activate a mechanism in the brain that searches for an answer. It will not rest until it finds one.

Questions are like playing “fetch” with a dog. Ask, and your mind’s “dog” will search for the “ball” (or “stick”).

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Domestic Violence is Devastating. We Need to Stop It!

Domestic violence scene

As we all know, the COVID-19 pandemic has affected almost every part of our daily life. Work, school and social engagements were adjusted to follow the restrictions. But the most troubling change is the huge increase in domestic violence all around the world.

Domestic violence has been damaging our society in more ways than COVID-19 ever will. But no one thinks we should shut down schools, states, airlines, restaurants, gyms or businesses until we eradicate it from our society. And we’re going to pay for this long after COVID-19 is gone.

Domestic violence is primarily directed at women and children. Why? Because they are more vulnerable.

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Negative Emotions: How to Really Help Your Kids Manage Them

Young man looking lonely and upset

As parents, it’s natural for us to want to keep our children from feeling what we perceive as negative emotions. We want to keep them from suffering. But as hard as it is to admit, by doing so, we often do more harm than good.

Most people grow up thinking that our purpose in life is to avoid suffering. But it isn’t!

We aren’t supposed to avoid suffering, we’re supposed to manage it. We should never fight it, or even try to control it. We must live with it and find ways to use it to our advantage.

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Light up the Darkness this Year – Happy 2021

Hands holding a candle in the dark

In 2020, I spoke a lot to my clients about pain, and our desire to get rid of it. We’re all afraid of pain, and sadly, the more afraid we are, the more pain we have. Pain is darkness, while joy is light.

It’s important to understand that pain is not the enemy. It’s only a messenger. And in 2021, I sincerely hope to see more joy.

I was 25 years old when I first encountered the concept of the body sending us messages. If you’re a spiritual person, you might think it’s God, or some other universal force. But no matter what you believe, paying attention to these messages helps greatly in maintaining your health.

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How to Be a Winner in Life

Balloons raining on a happy woman

Most people these days rush around, trying to get somewhere. They see life as a competition or a game they need to win. They keep wondering how to be a winner in life.

As we evolve and can rise above the survival mode in our life, we all ask the big question “What are we here for?” Looking for reasons for our existence is probably a good sign. Some call it an identity crisis.

I call it an awakening. It’s a point in time when we realize life is a game we play, and we suddenly want to understand it.

Much like any game, we play to win. Losing is no fun and we try to avoid it like the plague. When we’re happy, it feels like we’re winning, and when we’re unhappy, we feel like we’re losing.

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If I Only Knew: How to Learn from the Past

Young woman looking regretful

Have you ever said to yourself, “If only I knew [something], my life would be better now”? I know I have. Let’s look at how we can use this question to learn from the past, heal, and have a better future.

When I was a younger everyone wanted to be smart. Everyone praised high academic achievements and tried to get them. Yet even when I started to get good grades, which wasn’t easy for me, I still had the feeling they weren’t enough.

I was surrounded by smart people who got amazing grades, but they weren’t happy, and I didn’t envy them. Eventually, I realized that being wise is more useful than being smart.

This post is part 47 of 49 in the series Make a List

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How to Vaporize Psychological Pain with Psychological Painkillers

Bronze sculpture of man holding his head

Everyone understands what physical pain is. And the medical world is full of treatments and painkillers to eliminate this pain. But psychological pain is not that well-known and treating it is a bit more challenging.

Physical pain comes from damage to the tissues of the body. Psychological pain is a suffering with no apparent physical origin. You can even say that all the feelings we don’t like – sadness, grief, anger, contempt, frustration, rage, depression, etc. – are forms psychological pain.

Physical pain is often localized, temporary and associated with some harmful or damaging physical trigger. Psychological pain is a more generalized, lasting, unpleasant feeling resulting from an inability of to cope with emotional challenges. But sometimes, it manifests just like physical pain does.

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Seize the Day: Are You Using or Losing Your Time?

Watch in sand

Time is precious. Some say that time is the only thing we really have. Most people know the expressions “Carpe diem”, “Seize the day” and “Seize the present”, but only few actually live by them.

Time keeps moving forward. Often, we feel like it’s just flown past us and are out of time. So, we need to learn to appreciate the time we have and use it wisely. We all have the same 24 hours every day. We should make the most of them.

We say that children have no concept of time. My 3-year-old granddaughter has reached the stage of recognizing past and present. For her, the past is “yesterday”, and the future is “tomorrow”. That’s advanced for her age, but limited compared to an adult’s understanding of time.

But I wonder about this view.

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This Is How To Take Charge Of Your Life

One smile in a crowed of frowns

Many people want to take charge of their life, but simply don’t know how to. It’s one thing to understand that taking charge is important and another thing to actually do it. If you’re looking for tips that will help you, keep reading!

I wasn’t always in charge of my life. For my first 16 years, other people and circumstances ruled everything. I had no control whatsoever and my life looked, well, out of control.

I was sailing in the sea of life without a captain and was knocked around from side to side, crashing and tumbling when strong winds came. Without direction, without resources, with no captain and no crew to support me, every breeze turned into a storm.

For every two steps forward, I took one step back. Even when I made progress, I still felt I was going nowhere.

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How to Make Every Relationship You Want Good

Good relationship - holding hands

What makes a good relationship? Are there signs of a good relationship? What questions would you ask to find out if a relationship is good? How to have good relationships?

Every year, as September gets closer, my husband Gal and I think about relationships. This year, in September 2020, we’re celebrating 40 years of friendship. We’ve learned over the years that friendship is a special relationship worth celebrating.

When you spend many years with one person, you learn a lot about them. But mostly, you learn about yourself and what relationships mean.

This post is part 46 of 49 in the series Make a List

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