Make a list: About Myself

Two weeks ago, I wrote about the technique of writing lists of 100 items that we use in the Be Happy in LIFE coaching. I also explained the process we go through when we make a list. As promised, from this week, I am elaborating on each of the items of the mega list to give you the reasons for making each list, the process you will go through while completing the list and some tips and ideas to help you complete it, learn and experience growth while working on it.

Again, I am adding the rules of making the list. Make sure you follow the rules if you do not want to be frustrated (I do not want to give you another item to add to your 100 things I am frustrated about…this is why I took it off the list…)

List-making rules

100 things I would say about myself if I had to present myself to an unknown person

When you present yourself to an unknown person, you need to examine your thoughts, beliefs and feelings towards yourself and this may not be easy. When people are asked to describe themselves, they sometimes question whether this is who they are or who they think they are. For the purpose of making this list, who you think you are is all there is, so just write that.

The reason for making the list for an unknown person is to include all the areas of your life and take into account the full range of your experiences and behaviors. Using a particular person, say your boss, will most likely make you focus on work-related characteristics and then you might miss other important ones.

If you feel like writing “I am kind”, remember you do not have to be kind 24×7 to qualify. You only have to have one act of kindness, although I am sure you can easily find hundreds of examples of being kind if you keep thinking about it.

Many people describe themselves the way other people see them. You can usually tell this is the case when they say “Well, if others had to describe me…” Nobody is asking others describe you. Your own opinion is what matters here!

Everyone falls into this trap, but it only makes this a good exercise and a way to examine your thoughts about yourself and how influenced they are by what others think about you.

Kids presenting themselves

When doing this exercise with kids, it is even harder, because most of what they think about themselves is a reflection of messages they have received from the people who are close to them. When you give this task to kids, let them come up with as many things as they can on their own (and reduce the size of the list to make it easier on them).

Do not make fun of what they say. Do not tell them “This is not the real you” or make any remarks that will cause them to feel you are judging them. If they do say things about themselves you are concerned about, be happy, because now you know what to focus on when helping your kids on their personal development journey.

When presenting yourself, you will choose to write things you believe are essential parts of your identity. People say “I was born in…” when they believe it is an important part of who they are. Notice these things when they come out.

Although it may take you a while to get into the mode of presenting yourself, you may find that to draw a complete picture, you would have to say a lot more than 100 things. One of the challenges you may face is having to remove some items from your list, because you have too many, so that your self-presentation is consistent and, well, presentable.

This process of elimination has its own value, because it requires you to choose which of the items describe you best.

Ideas to add to the list

• Your name
• Your age
• Your gender
• Your country
• Your language
• Your family status
• Your financial status
• Your social status
• Your profession
• Things you love
• Things you hate
• Your character traits (“good” and “bad”)
• Your talents, skills and abilities
• Your dreams and desires
• Your habits
• Your hobbies
• Your life purpose
• What is important to you
• Stories from the past that have shaped your identity
• People who have shaped your identity

Join me next week for part 3 of the series – 100 people I consider my friends.

Happy list making!
Ronit