Top Parenting Bloggers Discuss (3): Best Parent Qualities

In the first post, our top parenting bloggers introduced themselves and their philosophy on life. In the second post, each parenting blogger gave their view on the top challenges of parenting (because knowing what we are facing is half the solution).

Today, our top parenting bloggers discuss the best qualities parents should have.

Like in every job, where your qualities determine how well you perform, the parenting “job” has its own set of qualities it requires. The “job” called parenting is different for each person therefore may require a different set of skills. I have asked the top parenting bloggers to list the best qualities every parent should have.

Here is what they wrote.

What are the 5 best qualities every parent should have and why?

Sue Scheff – Sue Scheff Blog

Accessibility – A parent should always try to be available when a child needs them. The kids/teens should know their parent is always there for them.

Creating Family Time – Whether it is having a family dinner regularly (which has become impossible with many of today’s families always on a fast pace), trying to have a family dinner several times a week can help you bond with your kids. I have always encouraged parents to take 15 minutes every evening (even if it is 9:00pm at night) to turn off the electronics and talk about their day.

Taking an interest in your child’s activities: Always encouraging your child to do their best and giving them the opportunities to help them reach their goals.

Susan Heim – Susan Heim on Parenting

Patience – Children will test your patience over and over again. It’s easy to “lose it” sometimes. It’s best to learn ways to calm down before reacting when kids push our buttons.

Empathy – Learn to put yourself in your child’s shoes and teach your child to do the same. If we all thought more about others’ feelings, the world (and the playground) would be much more harmonious!

Love – When it comes right down to it, all children just want to feel loved. Always show affection to your child. Let your child know that you may not love his behavior, but you will always love him.

Acceptance – Every child is different, and we need to accept that they won’t be a smaller version of ourselves.

Conviction – Parents need to be firm and consistent when doling out discipline. Let your children see that you mean what you say.

Annie Fox, M.Ed. – From the desk of Annie Fox

Patience – Children are small and inexperienced. Their little fingers and legs make them slower and less efficient. They are easily confused and cannot always articulate why they do the things they do. When parents are patient and respectful and create a safe place for children to express themselves, then we all benefit.

Humor – Kids are fun and they are often funny, sometimes intentionally, more often without meaning to be. Appreciating the humor in family situations is a great de-stressor for parents and kids. Laughing releases endorphins and that’s going to great more loving bonds!

Social Responsibility – We are citizens of the world. When you lend a hand to a neighbor, help a community organization, show your heart to someone who could use a friendly smile and a kind word, you teach your children that we’re all connected and that your expectation, based on what you model, is that helping each other is just what human beings do. From my way of thinking, that’s how you make more peace in the world.

Generosity of spirit – Show your children what it means to be a loving person. Give to them willingly, be it when you share food, a story, your feelings. Love them with an open mind and an open heart and they will grow and become open hearted young adults.

Inquisitive – Parents who wonder, aloud, about the way things work encourage their kids to be life-long learners. We don’t need to know all the answers. We just need to be fearless in asking questions and knowledgeable about where to turn to start looking for answers. Engage your kids in deep conversations about life, nature, society, technology, medicine, politics, philosophy, art, culture, the world.

Maria Melo – Conversations with Moms

I think first and foremost, every parent should always give unconditional love. No one is perfect and despite one’s imperfections, a child should never doubt a parent’s love for them.

Patience – It will be tested time and time again but a parent should always remember that children learn from their parents. If we lose control, they learn to lose control. If we manage our emotions, they too will learn to manage their emotions.

I believe one of the best gifts you can give your child is your time. So a great quality to have is to learn to manage time in a way that you ALWAYS make time with your family a priority.

It is no longer good enough to tell our children to “do as we say, not as we do”. Parents need to be great leaders in teaching their children about morality, empathy, discipline. It all starts with being the great leader and leading through example.

A sense of humor is one of the best qualities every parent should have. Sometimes, you have to laugh at the mess your children make and let them be children. Don’t take everything so seriously and have fun with your children

Annie – PhD in Parenting

Happy – Because when you smile, your kids will smile.

Confident – Because you’ll feel better about yourself if you don’t question every decision you make or beat yourself up about things that you cannot do.

Patient – A lot of negative parenting choices are made when parents are hurrying. Slow down, take a deep breath, and recognize that this too shall pass.

Able to listen – People who stop to listen to their kids, rather than constantly talking at them, have a much greater chance of having an impact on the child.

Nurturing – Show your child love and tenderness every day. The most important thing is that they know they are loved unconditionally.

Ria Sharon – My Mommy Manual

Self-regulation

Self-awareness

Patience

Playfulness

Presence

When I look at this list, I realize that all these qualities are important because of this concept: modeling. Children learn from watching you. Period. And these qualities are ones that will be instrumental in their lives.

Richard “RJ” Jaramillo – Single Dad

Having a sense of humor. Teaching our children the importance of laughter and having a sense of humor. I see too many parents being too serious around their children that they are forgetting one of life’s simple pleasures is to laugh out loud!

Teach your children how to Cook. The family that shares in making the meal, often eats better, healthier and has a family bond at the dinner table. I cook every meal with my children and they enjoy the variety and improvisation of cooking!

Have emotional balance. Teaching our children that it is “okay to feel sad or cry” is important in developing emotionally balanced children. I am not afraid to share all of my feelings with my children and they feel closer and more connected to me as their father. There is a wide spectrum of emotions and it’s too bad that many children only learn a few from their parents.

Be a better listener. We were all given two ears and one mouth, which means we should all practice listening twice as much and speak half as much as we do… As a parent, I have learned far too often that if I took that extra step in listening more, I could have resolved many misunderstandings sooner and jumped to conclusions far too often.

Affirmations. Parents shape their children and I take it seriously. Fathers shape daughters in many ways. Their self confidence and the men they choose to date has a lot to do with their relationship with their father. I remind my daughters each and every day how much I love and respect them. I make sure I am present with them and let them know how grateful I am being their father and they give me so much love. I am also grateful for my son and I make sure I let him know that I am always proud of him as well. I think every parent needs to know how much our children listen to our words of encouragement and support.

Ronit Baras – Family Matters

Happy Parent – I hear parents say, “It would make me happy to see my kids happy”, but I believe that happy parents raise happy kids – in that order.

Leader mentality – Parents are their family’s ship captains, so they need to take the responsibility to lead. Both parents may not have the same leadership qualities, but between them, they must share the lead.

Sensitive and flexible – Being able to adjust your parenting style to the particular kid, circumstances and generation gets harder every year due to fast social changes. Those who will can do it will be more successful.

Inspiring parents – More than other socializing agents, parents have the biggest influence over their kids. Therefore, they need motivation and inspiration techniques to help their kids move forward.

Wealth mindset – Parents with a healthy wealth mindset have a better chance of raising kids within financial stability, which I believe to be essential in parenting.

Again, I thank Annie, Maria, Annie, Ria, Richard, Sue and Susan for being part of this exciting project.

If you want to know more about them or contact any of the bloggers who take part in this project, please visit their blogs (linked above) and follow them on Twitter and/or Facebook.

If you want to ask our experts a question to be answered on this blog, please use the comment box below.

Tell us what you think are the best qualities every parent should have and remember, those qualities reflect your values and your focus in parenting. And in parenting, like the rest of life, you get what you focus on.

Next Friday, the Top Parenting Bloggers will tell you how the parenting experience has changed their life.

Happy parenting,
Ronit