Postnatal depression and other mental health problems related to pregnancy and childbirth are recently getting a lot of attention.
Many mothers become very sensitive while going through the stressful period of pregnancy and childbirth. They are much more susceptible to mental health challenges such as postnatal depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
For many years, these disorders were linked to hormonal changes and the trauma of the birth itself. Recently, this view has begun to be criticized. It puts a lot of pressure on mothers and does not examine other reasons for the mental challenges women go though after pregnancy and giving birth.
A study done by researchers from North Carolina State University, Simon Fraser University and the University of British Colombia wanted to check the relationship between partner abuse and women’s postpartum mental health. They measured various types of abuse, including physical, psychological and sexual, and mental health disorders. The researchers looked at postnatal depression, stress, anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder and post traumatic stress disorder. They discovered big correlations.
In the study, women from high socioeconomic backgrounds, with no history or risk of mental disorder, were interview about their partners. These were the results:
- 84% of the women in the study reported experiencing physical, psychological or sexual abuse by a partner prior to becoming pregnant.
- 70% of the pregnant women in the study reported some form of abuse by their partner during pregnancy.
- Forms of abuse ranged from name-calling to rape and even physical assault with a weapon.
- After giving birth, 61% of the participants reported symptoms of postpartum mental health problems. These included postnatal depression within three month after childbirth.
- 47% of them reported symptoms of moderate severity, which is considered a “clinical” level.
- Women who suffered more types of abuse also reported more severe mental health symptoms.
The most important part of the study was the relationship between the form of abuse and the mental problem. This information is also highly relevant to parents as it may shed some light on abused parenting and mental disorders in children.
Researchers found the following correlations:
- Psychological abuse (verbal and emotional) was associated with stress and PTSD.
- Physical abuse was associated with postnatal depression, OCD and PTSD.
- Sexual abuse was associated with stress, postnatal depression and PTSD.
These results can explain many mental disorders in women. But are women really the problem? When I shared this study with some of the women I work with, they were very upset that mental health assessments in pregnancy only focuses on the woman. What about the partners’ emotional health?
I believe that looking at partners will allow a more holistic approach to mental health. We should not only focus on giving women the skills to manage abuse, but also help men develop skills to prevent the abuse.
And what about the children? Since children always absorb what happens around them, this is also important for them. Abused mothers with mental health problems will raise abused kids with mental health problems. This is one area that needs plenty of research – the impact of parental abuse on children’s mental health.
Pregnancy and giving birth can be difficult. But they can also be exciting and smooth. Giving everyone involved the skills to cope with such the challenging experience of having a new baby will give us better adjusted parents, and therefore better adjusted children.
Postnatal depression is not random and knowing its sources can help stop it from being so common and affecting so many lives.
Happy and healthy pregnancy!
Ronit
Hi,
I have no idea if it is post natal depression but my partner within 7 weeks of giving birth to a beautiful boy slowy become violent and angry with rages for tiny things completely inranged sometimes to saying nothing ignoring me till she took our son without and discussion at all,
It was a very sad and a huge shock,
Strangely i felt a relife my partner was gone as she was so angry most days but my son gone hurt very much and not knowing was hard,
She has refused to talk to me and accused me of abuse by generallising and wont tell me spcifically or has ever really told me what was wrong.
Her parents think i havent looked after her and wont talk to me and she alienated me from my son for many weeks not aloud to touch him untill showered and she started taking our son early morning before i would wake the three weeks before she left for a different city north every day,
I didnt realize at first what was happening or did i ask because she was so angry but it felt deliberate as we had discussed early morning to bond for me as mum was breast feeding too so he wanted mum most.
I’m in the most horrible place left feeling my son is gone and doesnt know me now and been told i had been abusive verbally and threatening which i had not ever,
To have to justify such a lie and be told by your lawyer you could be in for a horrible experience with little hope of really seeing my son for years and guilty by false allegations in a travisty and extremely traumatic situation you have no control over emotionally or legally,
My lawyer has ask for one day a month and agreed i havent threatened her on text as said by her but other allegations i cant prove or can she but i want my son and im completely innocent,
My ex feels like a serial killer mind set to destroy me and my sons relationship,
I dont know what more i can do but wait and hope my one day a month is aloud,
Please help me if anyone can im desperate
Dear Tony,
It is very sad to hear what you are going thought. I think the sad bit is that there are many stories like that.
It is possible that post natal depression has impact on such relationship and in situations where there is “he said” “she said” hearing one side of the story is not healthy nor trying to judge which one of you is right.
Pregnancy and having a baby is very hard on the body and most post natal depression has some signs during pregnancy. The best way to deal with it is to prevent it by having a good support system and emotional support during pregnancy . In your case, it is late but nevertheless, she needs support. She needs it because she is raising a baby regardless if she is allowing you to see the baby or not.
As a life coach, I can suggest your focus needs to be on making sure she gets help. If she thinks you abused her, it does not matter if you did or not. What matters is that she feels unsafe around you. This feeling is not healthy for a mother to have and that will impact her parenting skills. So, if you care about her and your son. Do not get into a fight with her on visiting rights and focus on showing genuine interest regarding her health and well-being.
If she says you did something and you say “I didn’t” you don’t take responsibility and that will only escalate the conflict. If you think she is “nuts” than there was something in your relationship that drove her nuts. Blaming her hormones for it (Which is a possibility) is going to backfire. For her, it will be perceived as you not taking responsibility over your actions.
Remember, we are not looking for who is right or who is not, we are looking for your health and well-being and her health and well-being.
So, this is my suggestion. Change the focus from winning the battle over your son to making sure that the women who will raise your child ( which in the best scenario ever will be shared custody and only later in life because he is a baby) will be healthy.
Good luck and work on yourself and your personal development to make sure you became again an attractive to her.
Ronit