How to Overcome Shyness: Types of Shyness

Shyness is experienced by most people, young and old, in social situations. Most people also seem to think they are shier than everyone else. Surprisingly, that is not true. 98% of people think of themselves as shy. As children, some people lack the skills and lived experiences of coping in social environments, which makes them feel crippled and develop a sense of helplessness because of it.

Shyness can be debilitating. The good news is that it can be changed.

Shyness is a form of anxiety. The severity of the anxiety depends on the type of shyness.

Situational Shyness

Situational Shyness means experiencing anxiety in certain, specific situations. Examples include, during a test, in a big group, when standing on stage, while having to present or make a speech, when answering a question, having to think on your feet or trying to make a good impression. The main challenge in this shyness is the timing. It never feels like the ‘right’. You never feel ready to tackle the task before you.

Transitional Shyness

Feeling anxious when experiencing change is called Transitional Shyness. This can happen at time like starting a new job, on the first day of school, when something does not work like you expected, during a divorce, when moving to a new house. The main challenge in this type of shyness is change. Things are changing and you may not be used to it.

Permanent Shyness

Feeling anxious as part of daily life is Permanent Shyness. This is particularly true in social situations. People tend to think shyness is a personality trait. They repeatedly say that they always remembered themselves to be a ‘shy’ person. The main challenge in this type of shyness is the anxiety itself. Like the saying, “The fear of the wolf is always greater than the wolf itself”, the anxious feeling is often scarier than the act itself.

This post is a quick outline of the types of ‘shyness’. Check in next time for the next chapter in the series. The topic will be overcoming shyness and reasons why we feel shy.

Happy week,
Ronit

Related

How to Overcome Shyness: Causes of Shyness

In the previous shyness post, I explained about the three types of shyness: situational shyness (in specific situations), transitional shyness (during transitions or change) and permanent shyness (pretty much in all social situations). To be able to overcome our shyness, we need to understand the reasons behind it. Here are…

December 3, 2013

In "Personal Development"

How to Overcome Shyness: Tips

Being shy can be pretty debilitating. And surprisingly, most people have experienced it at least once in their lives. In this part of "How to Overcome Shyness", I want to share some tips with you on overcoming shyness. We know from part one that there are three types of shyness:…

December 10, 2013

In "Personal Development"

How to Overcome Shyness: Extra Tips

In this final post of How to Overcome Shyness, I have added a few more tip to help you and your child. If strangers are your greatest fear, practice. Conquer your fear by starting conversations with total strangers. Say something to the bus driver or the supermarket cashier. You will…

December 17, 2013

In "Personal Development"