Stress is known to be the number 1 killer in the world today. More even than accidents and war (which are also attributed to being stressed). Even the disease in the world are related to stress.

In the previous chapter of the stress pill, I explained a few things:

1. Every one want to be happy. The obstacle to happiness is fear that manifest as stress.
2. Stress will make us fight, run away or stay paralyzed.
3. What was once a real threat, like a lion or a snake, is now merely a thought, an idea or a belief that triggers the defense mechanism.
4. We are dumber when we are under stress.
5. We can’t prepare ourselves for pain in order to avoid pain.
6. Rating happiness (and stress) is a good technique to bring more happiness or avoid stress. Practice rating your emotions. 1-100 is a good rating scale. With kids, 1-10 is good and with younger kids even 1-3 can do the trick.
7. We can’t be happy all the time. We need to be more happy than stressed in order to come out on top.
8. When we practice being stressed over and over again, we make ourselves sensitive to it, like a stress button that becomes sensitive to even a slight touch.
9. Happiness and stress cannot be experienced at the same time. Don’t waste your time and energy on stress!

In my work with my coaching clients, I explain that our feelings and thoughts are a choice. My slogan is “happiness is a choice”. With this choice, there are three main pills: the happiness pill, the chill pill and the stress pill.

The Happiness Pill

Over the years, I have collected many strategies to make people happy. I have tried to share them in this blog. When I write about them, I want each of them to be a happiness pill. Ever post contains a “pill of happiness”.

The thing is, people seem to understand happiness better when they can compare it to stress. I have written some posts about stress in the past and found this to be true. That is how the idea for this series was born. So in this chapter I will describe thoughts, beliefs and ideas in the form of a “stress pill”.

10 Stress Pills

Here are some of the top “stress pills” – beliefs and behaviors that are making you more stressed by the minute.

1. Worry! When you worry, you are in fact, thinking about the future. You think planning ahead will help you prepare in case of a bad future. In your experience, your anticipated bad future never happens, so to you, worrying about the future is an insurance against bad outcomes.
2. Complain! At every opportunity, complain. There are many things you can complain about: others, the weather, your health, your job, your daily routine, things you have to do, politics or the news. The list is endless. Complaining is healthy for you as it is a form of expression. If we don’t complain, things will never change.
3. Criticize! There are so many stupid people around, tell them what you think about them and about their abilities. Find fault in everything. They need to know what they have done wrong in order to improve. You know exactly what they need to do, if only they asked you.
4. Judge! The world surrounds you and whatever others do that does not fit your standards is wrong and needs to be addressed and corrected.
5. Blame! Anything and everyone! This will help you with having to carry any responsibly on your shoulder. Responsibility is too heavy and create lots of stress. If you blame others, it will be their job to take care of it.
6. Be lonely! You don’t need other people at all. You are the person that is responsible for your own needs anyway. You are the best to know what you want and need. People can be chaotic and needy and relationships are hard and problematic. The less time you spend with others, the better!
7. Be a nitpicker! All the little things in life are just as important as the big things. Life is made out of those small tiny things. Never give up what is important to you. Make sure everything is important to you. If you are a nitpicker, people appreciate you and think that your things are more valued. Nitpick on small things and on big things in the same proportion so your ideas will be heard and followed.
8. Be demanding! Only people who demand what they want get what they want. This world belongs to the demanders! Never ask people for things or to do things, demand that they do it and tell them off if they don’t. Demand that they talk to you in a particular way, demand that they do things in a particular way and love you in a particular way. Mix it with expecting perfection and you’ll be on top of the world!
9. Make sure everyone knows that things will be done “your way or the highway”. You cannot afford to go through life allowing any of those (inferior) people to make the rules. They must obey you. Bullies are strong and powerful. When you are the lion, you are no longer scared of lions at all!

In a competition of misery, everyone wins

Ronit Baras

10. Be aggressive! It is important that everyone around knows who is the boss and who makes the rules. Shout, scare, threat, bribe and use any “motivating” technique to make people do what you want them to do. If they become afraid of you, good! Next time it will be easier.

Do you ever find yourself having thoughts like these? If you do, you are on the fast track to stressville. Join me next time on the stress pill series with 30 more stress pill ideas.

Meanwhile, be happy!
Ronit