I remember the days before we bought our second home. Our family told us to buy a place that would fit all our kids into it. Our daughter was just 1 year old and we fell into that trap of thinking 15 years ahead. The place we bought was a huge apartment with a special room for a teenager. We lived there for about a year and a half and the spare rooms stood empty all this time.
Gal and I, not really having our own rooms most of our childhoods, really wanted our kids to have their own separate rooms. So whenever we moved (our 19-year-old daughter Eden has lived in 17 different homes in her life), we looked for a house that had space for each of the kids, but things did not work out as we expected.
During school holidays, the younger kids (now 12 and 6) wanted to sleep over in Eden’s room. They took mattresses, their special blankets and pillows, migrated to her room and left their room empty and bare. Eden was happy for them to join the party and left the door of her closet open, so she could take clothes in the morning without having to move them. This happened one night, two nights, a week, a month and if I did not send them back to their room from time to time (after they started arguing who would sleep on the left mattress and who would sleep on the right), they would probably be sleeping over in her room the whole year (minus the days we invite all three of them to have a slumber party in our room).
So why do should we buy a big house, with many rooms, clean it and pay more mortgage if do not really use all of it?
Over the years, in 10 different places, our kids would sleep over in each other’s rooms most of the year. The only times they preferred to sleep in their own rooms was when they had a friend coming to sleep over and that did not happen as often (you know, school days are out of the picture and weekends are family time…). So we always have extra rooms for friends.
Every time we moved to a new house, Gal and I said, “Well, now they are older … now she is getting into her teen years and will want some privacy”, but again, they preferred the giggling nights as if they were on camp all year round.
Last night, our kids went together to bed, the three of them in the same room. Gal joined in with them for the fun and sang them funny songs from his childhood. They were crying from laughter over silly things as he sang songs and they cracked jokes. Every night feels like a slumber party. 3 kids with big age gaps between them and they prefer sleeping together to comfort and privacy. When we turned off the light, Gal and I looked at each other, asking ourselves the same question again, “Why did we bother buying a house with this many rooms if our kids end up sleeping together most of the year anyway?”
Are we missing something here? What do you think?
Happy parenting,
Ronit
and this is my reply:
Hi Stars,
Good to hear from you again.
How were the results of your exams?
if you want to stop thinking about school, just make a happy list and do one item from this list every day.
It is easy,
do you have such a list?
you can read about this list here:
http://www.ronitbaras.com/index.php/emotional-intelligence/personal-development-c/make-a-list-5-things-i-am-happy-about/
keep me updated.
Everything will be fine.
Happy day
Ronit
The Motivational Speaker
This is another letter from Stars
Hi,
yet another e-mail lol, sorry!!! I have just finished my gcse’s and now i have 3 months to wait for my results. I am not sleeping well and i was shattered yesterday, so i assumed i would. I was freezing cold yesterday as i used up all my concentration in the exams. I hope they’ve paid off. I really want to go to college so i can have a fresh start again. But to do that i need a B in RE a B in geography a B in English literature and a B in English language. Then i need C’s in the rest of them.
I’m worried sick because i really want this chance to start a fresh but i also really need to enjoy my holidays, i notice you havent been on for a whil!! i’ve been busy too and now i’m trying to empty my head full of all the subjects please help!!
Thanks
Stars
Hi Stars,
How did you go with your exams?
I remember that liking boys without them liking you back was very painful. But I learned from it that popular girls had something I didn’t have and I needed to develop it.
If you examine all the girls around, you may find that the popular girls are not always the pretty, or the best students in school. They have confidence in themselves about something, it is essential. try it!
If that girl is avoiding you, just find new friends.
I suggest that if you feel trapped, do nothing! When we feel like that, we make silly decisions that we regret later on.
Stop talking about repeating a year and blaming your parents for everything. it will not hold for long. move forward. Instead of wasting so much energy on the divorce or repeating a year, try working on feeling good about yourself and doing things you love.
Do you have a list of the 100 things that make you happy?
if not, make a list.
Do you have a list of the 100 good things you can say about yourself?
If not, make a list.
you can share it with me if you want.
you are not bothering me at all.
How long do you have until the end of the year?
When you look back at this period, it’ll be so small and meaningless.
It’ll be fine.
Happy day
Ronit
hi again, sorry i keep on writing!! its just sometimes i think everything i do seems to go wrong, all the people from my old school who i was friends with are now ignoring me, i am in due course regularily shattered not just from my exams but from stress of other needs that i am not getting. The boys that i have liked just seem to ignore me and seem to want the popular girls. i am going to college after gcse’s so that i can develop a social life. the girl who was popular just didnt turn up and avoided mentioning town whenever i confronted her about it, she would change the subject!!!
All these people i used to know just ignored me when i went onto comprehensive and people keep on saying wait untill the summer. but i’ll be the one board twidling me thumbs becus i dont have a life!!!i want someone my age preferably a boy to have to be able to confide in but at the moment all i have is my parents and they dont do shopping etc i’ve been thinking about showing one of the boys i used to know who’s facebook i have and who’s ignoring me the page because i feel sooooooo trapped, its not as if i dont have a nice house or anything its just after repeating a year and my parents divorcing everything seemed to go wrong!!! anyway sorry for bothering you !!
STARS
hi,
i’d also like to add that i have a friend who’s popular and asked to go into town with and i said that i’d get back to her in music but i forgot so i left an e-mail and she hasnt got back, it’s as if mum’s putting pressure on me because she makes me ask them and gets annoyed if i dont. But i do really want to have friends, that’s why i’m thinking of college because there i can make a fresh start and forget about repeating a year and make more friends and do all of the things i’ve wanted to do like go to south hampton shopping with a group of friends and one of my so called friends sarah weaved into my friends whilst manipulating me.
because i didnt feel very good about myself she is now more friends with them than i am when i was friends with them first. it’s just that they walk home with eachother and i dont have any friends who get on my bus so i always walk home alone, they go shopping to castlepoint and i dont get invited
When i’m with the group i feel even more isolated because i dont know what to say i dont feel invited or welcomed in my presence i feel as if sarah purposely did that so she wouldnt be on her own.
i always seem to get friend things wrong, that’s why next week i dont think i’m going to flute choir because i dont feel i can manage it.
Have you got any advice??
hi,
my geography teacher unfortunately hasnt marked all the work. and a C in biology basically means i passed my mock.
i have two exams next week no its three or four why are they doing so many in two weeks in the real exam mine are more spaced out than that!!!!
Hi Stars,
I am so happy to read what you wrote, it has a positive feeling to it. As if you are more optimistic.
when you study for a test, remember that improvement is the only thing you need. The only question is ” how better I did this time?”
My drama teacher, who helped us with a very funny play that we really had to try hard not to laugh the whole play, taught us that if you look at your finger nails you can’t laugh. He said that whenever we burst out laughing we need to look at our nails and it will immediately stop – it works, try it!
After a while I have learned that I can do the same when I need to stand in front of hundreds of people. I close my eyes and when I open them I look at my nails and it is gone. Try it!
How did you do in Geography?
What did you mean I got a C in Biology?
keep working, you’ll make it.
think happy thoughts
Ronit
Kids Coaching
Hi,
Thankyou very much for the advice, i have never heard of anyone else before who has repeated a year apart from me so it’s good to know i’m not the only one!!!
i’ve just had four mocks this week and am dew for another mock tomorrow, english language pre-release and media texts. the good thing is i got a C in my biology 40/45 came top of the class- i dont know any of my other results yet!!!
i also have my flute grade four next wednesday which should be fine as long as i dont have a panicy moment because i know i’m really good at the flute!!!
i’ll also be finding out my geography results tomorrow aah anyway i’ve got to go more work…….
thankyou for the info!!!
Stars
Stars,
That means you are the genius!
I agree with you, your mom should have said that.
did you know that most people in the world, if they hear something 3 times, they think it is true ( even if it not – it has been researched) so can you imagine kids their parents tell them “you are wonderful!” ” you are wonderful” “you are wonderful”. can you imagine what those kids think about themselves. if you think you are wonderful – the sky is the limit.
on the other hand, imagine kids that their parents say you have problems and they say it 3 times. can you imagine how horrible kids think about themselves. If you think you are problematic – nothing you will do will make you ever feel good.
So, no, your mom should not have said it but… she probably never meant to do any damage with it. Most parents mean good.
Well done on the determination! this trait is more important in life than anything you will ever learn in school.
Can you just use a lip gloss?
for 10 years of my schooling I have never seen an A. It was something I wanted but never knew how to get there. it is not boring to get an A, people say boring when they mean – it is so hard or I am so disappointed. Nothing in life is boring, only boring thoughts. make sure you have interesting thoughts. success is great and you just need to feel the taste of it. work on it and tell yourself ” I am successful, I deserve it” ( say it again and again and after a while it will be part of who you are.
My failures in grade 10 were physics, biology and chemistry and God knows why but literature ( can you believe it, me? I was writing stories and I got F in literature – it was because I had an embracing conflict with the teacher the previous year and he gave me F no matter what I did)
but, determination changed it and I said to myself the whole summer ” I can do it” ” I can do it” “I can do it” and you know what? I did! and they allowed me to go back to year 11 ( they kicked me out of school for 4 failures our of 7 subjects)
take a piece of chocolate before the test – preferably dark chocolate.
Fish oil is good for memory
drink plenty of water the day before ( 1 liter per 22 kg of weight)
get a good sleep and before you go to bed say to yourself ” I am good, I can do it!” again and again and again until you fall asleep.
seconds before the test close your eyes and say ” I am good, I can do it” and go for it!
the way the education system presents tests is very bad. Tests are not for you my dear Stars, they are for the teachers to find out if they did a good job or not!
If you fail, it means your teacher did a bad job!
If you succeed, it means your teacher did a good job!
Test do not check what people know or not, it checks if the teacher was interesting, effective, motivating… it has nothing to do with you at all.
You want to succeed for you and you need to look at the tests as a way for you, to examine a progress that’s all.
Success is not getting A but getting a better score than last time!
step by step people can walk far.
when is the next exam?
Ronit
Kids Coaching
Ronit
Hi,
thankyou very much, i wanted to learn the piano first and when i was about 7 i got to gripps with sight reading then i was off!! i also wanted to play the flute- so it was my idea!!!
My mum always said that i have learning problems and maybe she shouldn’t have done. she also put me into disability gymnastics, which i am now in mainstreem but i couldnt really see my self as normal when with them.
i do find it hard to stick to revision but i am determined!!!
and yes i did have speach therapy when i was younger i also cant feel my lips so when they get cracked i simply dont realise but thats about the only noticable symptom apart from not getting A*’s but who would??? a bit boring!!!
i just get really worried about exams even when they’re only mocks!!! because i want to pass soo much and chemistry and physics i find hard !!
anyway thankyou
stars
Hi Stars,
Interesting but, pneumonia is not a reason for kids not to speak. I am sure there were other things involved or that someone did not understand what the doctor said. Though Pneumonia is really serious for babies, I do not think anyone can say (not even all mighty doctors) that it will cause kids not to be able to speak.
The worster drought syndrome is a diagnosis based on symptoms meaning it is very open to interpretation. I myself am a special education professional and I can tell you about hundreds of kids I saw myself that were diagnosed with all sorts of syndromes that only God could forgive them for the damage they have done with that diagnosis.
The syndrome means that there is a muscle challenge in the mouth – so it may interfere with speaking, eating… but stimulation to the mouth muscle can help a lot with, believe it or not, chewing gum ( I have saved so many kids from such diagnosis when I suggested the parents to do “Chewing Gum Therapy” or you can help by playing wind instruments. Whoever came up with the idea that you play the flute was a genius. So playing the flute and having the worster drought syndrome cannot live together.
This syndrome should not have any impact on your social skills or academic function – someone planted this in your head and you know what? – it is easier getting rid of learning difficulties than bad emotional image of yourself.
It could be that you had challenges and it made you reserved or that you have missed some schooling and felt out of touch with the other kids and it only got worst over the years but I think believing that something is wrong with you is the worst belief to have!!!!!!
I am sure you have great qualities and talents and that you can turn things around. NO, not all kids must be talented in math and English or Science – there are so many talents and abilities that will help you in life and Math, English and Science are really at the bottom of that list.
Some dads ( you know what, even moms) are strict and not soft. I believe from what you are writing that you are a kinesthetic girl and strict and tough parent can be very hard to kinesthetic kid but, you should forgive him and remember that he is probably struggling that the world is not perfect the way he wants it to be. some people grow up to be perfectionists and perfectionism is a disease, a very hard disease to overcome. So if your dad is putting a pressure on you, think of him as having a disease. poor guy!
Science is not necessary a kinesthetic lesson because it can be boring if there are too many restricting rules and limitation.
The way you describe your visual ability is a perfect description of a visual person. Auditory person would remember every sentence the teacher says, that means you are not auditory.
read this, it will answer all your question about kinesthetic kids:
http://www.ronitbaras.com/index.php/focus-on-the-family/parenting-family/stimulating-kinaesthetic-kids/
and read this, it will answerer all your questions about visual kids:
http://www.ronitbaras.com/index.php/focus-on-the-family/parenting-family/stimulating-visual-kids/
it is great to hear you are taking care of your relationship with your dad and going through counseling.
Happy day
Ronit
Kids Coaching
hi,
thankyou for the two hours info. When i was conceived, i almost didnt come out, i was then diagnosed with pneumonia and told that i may not ever be able to speak. the doctor also told my parents that i may not do very well in school as i may have damage to the brain, however i appear to not have damage to the brain. when i was younger anyway, i was diagnosed with worster drought syndrom even i am not quite sure what thaat is- i have pretty much grown out of it it just means i find things harder in school and socially. mum said i was also screened for cystic fibrosis which i dont have. My dad wasnt very supportive or very fatherly to me when i was growing and he still isnt now he doesnt let me speak and assumes he is right as he’s so clever because he got 10 A’s and 3 A’s and an oxbridge degree in medicin or whatever it is. Sometimes, i find him very intimidating, he makes me feel useless and small even though he says he loves me i dont feel it.
i think i’m a visual learner because if i really focus i can take pictures in and remember them where as a teacher speaking i’d of forgotten every word by the time i got home.maybe i got the wrong meaning of auditory learning then i would say i was also kinesthetic too now. except i hate science experiments because i’m always the odd one out who has no -one to go with!!! i am seeing a councellor at the moment and me and my dad are going to have mediation so i can say what i want to.
please leave your opinion!!
thankyou
stars
Hi Stars,
I think two and a half hours in one evening is a lot. It is good you take breaks.
It is great you went to the flute session.
Keep going, it will get better. Music is so wonderful for brain development. Did you know that kids that play a music instrument are smarter in school than kids that don’t? and the more years the play, the smarter they are.
Usually, people play a music instrument have something kinaesthetic in them – which means they learn through the body and have strong feelings and intuition. But when you describe yourself as needing silence, it usually means you are auditory – kids that learn from listening but their challenge is noises or people that talk loud and if the teacher is shouting they can’t think.
Why do you think you are visual?
What do you mean when you say problem at birth?
What kind of problems?
About revision:
I learned that if I learn the day before, it does not work for me. I needed to learn slowly so I had a plan for every test.
1. A month before I started summarising the subject. If it was math, I would write the formulas and typical example sums.
2. Two weeks before I would sit 30 minutes and do something – every day!
3. 3 days before I would go over the summarised papers and read them out loud and talk to myself. From time to time I would look at the page to remember
4. 2 days before I would go over it again and walk around and talk to myself and repeat whatever was written on the pages
5. The night before I would use highlighter to mark the important parts and again talk to myself as if I am answering the questions and go to sleep. Never stay late at night to study. When we are tired there are so many physical systems that shuts down and it is harder to think.
6. The morning of the test I would wake up one hour early and mark the most important things on my pages with a line – using a ruler.
When I came to the test – I knew everything by heart
Good Luck!
Ronit
Family Matters
hi
i meant two and a half hours in one evening. sorry, i usually have a 45 minute block and then twenty minute brake. yes i did go to the flute session, the pieces were hard but i had a good time!!
i know i’m a visual learner, but due to some problems when i was a baby i find some things harder to grasp and therefore cant do it on my own!!! i also know i like complete silence when revising or in class which is hard at such a big school!!
do you remember how much revision u used to do???
thankyou
stars
Hi Stars,
I hope you think of yourself as a star – you should! We all stars inside, some of us forget to shine…
I wrote about studying for a test. Read this post, it has lots of great tips:
http://www.ronitbaras.com/index.php/focus-on-the-family/parenting-family/how-to-study-for-tests/
I think two and a half hours is a looooooooooot!
God, you are amazing. Someone who can concentrate for such a long time is an inspiring person.
It is better to study in blocks of 20 minutes and change to something else. So if you have 3-4 subjects, do each for 20 min and give yourself some time off. While you are doing other things the brain thinks and processes some of that new information.
Make sure you get up and do something, stretch and drink plenty of water before you move to the new activity.
I guess it is very important to find out the best way for you to remember. I will give you options and you can pick the one is best for you:
1. Some kids learn better when they write it down – summarize.
2. Some kids learn better if they talk to themselves while studying. It is not funny, walk around the room and talk to yourself as if you are a lecturer talking about it.
3. Some kids learn better if they learn with other people.
4. Some kids learn better if they have a lot of colours and graphs on the revision sheet.
5. Some kids needs to try different kinds of tests again and again and again….
6. Some kids must have examples to memorize. In that case for every topic, have an example
7. Some kids learn better when there is music in the background.
8. Most kids learn better if they explain it to someone else. Tell mom or dad, how about I talk to you or tell you about it and you just have to listen and ask questions from time to time. It always works.
Pick the option that you think may work best for you. Some kids pick 2 or 3 that they think may work and try them one at a time until you find one that works best for you.
Did you go to the other Flute choir session?
Happy day
Ronit
Be Special, Be Yourself
Hello,
im not quite in exam period, but i have mocks and thing s comming up. How much revision should i be doing each night???? is an hour and a half enough???? i use my frees at school to revise. then i got home and just had one of those days where i started to worry to much so i did half an hour and i couldnt do anymore.
what is the maximum?? i usually do two and a half hours every night.
thankyou
stars
Hi Stars,
It is great to hear you went to the flute choir. I am so happy that people were nice to you. My son does music and I found that people doing music are friendly and support each other. I am so happy he hangs around with them. I think it will be good for you to hang around supportive people.
6 weeks is not long. I remember that I couldn’t wait for my son to be born and I counted weeks, days, hours and sometimes minutes. My trick was to have something interesting to do each day to look forward to and it worked. I would schedule meeting someone, going somewhere, going to the library, talking to my sisters on the phone and it helped.
Are you in the exam period?
There was a time in my degree studies that I did not like hanging around the other students in free periods. They would gossip all the time and I did not like it at all – it was bad energy so I have made a decision:
1. If I have a free lesson, I do anything to fill it with something to do ( I ended up finishing a 4 year degree in about 3 years)
2. If I have a free lesson, I go to the library and borrow books that I need.
3. If I have a free lesson, I do my homework
4. If I have a free lesson, I study for a test.
5. If I have a free lesson, I will volunteer in the special education library. So at first I went there to volunteer and after a week they offered me to work there, so they paid peanuts but I learned so much from people who worked in the library and instead of sitting in the cafeteria and gossiping about other people I was so efficient and productive.
When I was in high school, I went to help in the library. I always loved books and the librarian loved me too. Every time I came she would show me new books and when everyone could take 1 book home, she would give me 3 and if other people could take it for a week, she would allow me to keep them as long as I wanted. You can try that.
Assertiveness is a trait that most people do not have so go to the self esteem mini course and learn from the articles how you can boost your self esteem.
Here is the first chapter: (there are about 17 of them at the moment)
http://www.ronitbaras.com/index.php/life-coaching/self-esteem-mini-course-part-1/
Go to all the chapters, they will help you a lot.
What is happening next year?
Thank you again for sharing this with all the readers and write, I promise to answer.
Happy Week
Ronit
Be Special, Be Yourself for Teenagers
Hi,
I went along to Flute choir just for half an hour to try it out, they all seemed really friendly!!! i’m going back this week for the full hour!!! I was still quite shy but people spoke to me and me to them…. so just see how it goes!!!
and yeah, i might stick to the library for brakes however we cant eat in the library so not for lunch!!!
My old school has closed down unfortunately!!! but as i only have six weeks left of this school i’ll keep going to flute choir- hopefully make some friends and then school will be over!!!
and i’ll try some assertiveness as that is an area i struggly with!!1
thankyou
stars
Stars,
Is it possible to talk to your mom about going back to the old school?
Were you happy there?
Most kids in the world have lots of pressure on them so you are not alone. It is a good idea to learn some asserviness skills.
learn to say :
I expect…
I’d rather…
I would like to…
I think it is better if I…
Positivness is in you and no one can take it away from you.
How about going to the library during breaks or doing your homework instead of hanging around people you do not like.
It is better hanging around people that make you feel good and wonderful, beacause you are! everyone is!and if your friends do not make you feel like that, they are not friends.
Did you try for the flute choir? it is a brilliant idea.
I remember the first time I stood in front of people, it was scary but I talked to myself and said, I am good! I can do it! I will imporve! every time it will be easier and you know waht, I convinced myself and it worked. you can do it too.
Tell me how you went with the choir.
Happy day
and thank you for sharing this with everyone here.
RonitBaras.com
Hi,
i want some advice. i go to a comprehensive school and am in year 11, i am about two months away from completing my GCSE’s. The problem comes when i was young i had problems at birth; they said i may not even speak. Due to this in year nine mum decided that i should repeat a year, she really wanted me to go to Lewiston school a very good one in my area.
Dad on the other hand said he couldn’t afford it- my parents are divorced and have been for six years. Now i am unhappy in school, i wasn’t very good at social environments due to problems when i was younger it meant i couldnt play with kids my age.So when i first went to my school from a school of 60 kids to 2,500 i was obviously very overwhelmed and therefore became shy and quiet. I get very anxious even just walking in the corridor because i’m always the one by myself.
i don’t have the friends that i want either. i want ones that like shopping i want to have boyfriends and get frustrated and sometimes cry because of this.
My step mum also put alot of pressure under me they try to make me be the persom they want me to be not the person i want to be and that’s usually to do with good grades i get a few A’s B’s and C’s apart from physics.
At my school these are only average results which again makes me feel useless especially as i have repeated a year.
i have had friends but because of my unability to speak up for myself they have taken advantage of me.
Recently, i came up with an idea, i am a flautist apparently i’m very good. i’m on grade four and have only been playing for two years. The point is there’s flute choir at school and i think this would be a great way to help my anxiety and performance skills and more to the point make more friends what do you think???
i’m really worried about them not liking me because i’m unpopular and ‘thick’ i get really parannoyed i hate who i hang out with at lunch times and brake times but i have no where else to go. How do i remain really calm and positive??????
please reply soon thankyou so much
Hi E,
I used to sleep with my sisters for many years. I do not have many memories from the time we slept all 4 of us girls in one room but when we were 2 of us, it was fun (I was mature and remember more of it). When I was 16, I finally got my own room but my younger sisters and I were such good friends that it was hard for us every night to go to sleep. We would spend the time in their room (which was bigger) and late at night we would say, “Ok, now we have to say good night and go to sleep” and it was soooo hard to actually do it.
I wish all people in the world to have someone to sleep with.
May the force be with you
Ronit
Relationship Coaching
Ronit,
As a kid from a house just like you describe, it is WAY more fun to have someone close by. And its always in those last seconds before bed, when you know that if you just turn your mind off for one second you will fall asleep, that you suddenly remember the million and one things you wanted to talk about. :-)
Hi Tina,
Great to see you here.
I was not allowed to sleep over much. We lived in a small place; no one went to sleep over at friends’ house. I think the first time was when I was in grade 9 (after two to three weeks of fights and crying) and I went to sleep over at my best friends’ house and it was so strange, to realise that other people live differently.
Most of the sleepovers were at my cousin’s place or at my grandmother’s place on holidays. We were so happy that we did not have enough matrasses but we did not mind that. Being together was the most important thing. I have great memories of laughing with no reason and adults would come and say “quiet” hundreds of times and we would giggle with tears.
When the kids have friends for sleep over, I go to their room and say “quiet” and I giggle with Gal. I like the game, I say “quiet” they giggle and 10 minutes later I come again and everyone is happy.
For about 12 years of my life, I slept in the living room with my other three sisters so no one in my family had enough space (7 people one and a half room and a living room). It is still strange for me that my kids do not have any need to have their own space. I guess it is all relative to your life circumstances. I am happy they prefer the “together” over the “my own room” but when I look around I realise they are different kids – no complains. I am happy and proud of them.
It is a shame they did not allow you to sleepover. I guess it is fear. We cannot blame anyone for having fears, can we?
Come again.
Hugs and love
Ronit
http://www.behappyinlife.com
You’re not missing anything. One of my best memories from childhood is when my cousin would stay over. I had the smallest room it was about 3m x 4m if that but he would sleep on a mattress next to me and we would talk and giggle and do crazy things like tell ghost stories with a torch. And then sometimes we would tie our hands to each other so that when one of us woke up and moved – the other had to wake up too!.
Then we reached a certain age and we were not allowed to sleep in the same room anymore and he came to visit less. I was so lonely after that. Its much more fun to share what little space you may have, than to be sleeping by yourself!