There are some more important questions to ask if you want to know your partner and our topics for today are home, food, telecommunication and pets. These questions will help you find out the things you and your partner find it hard to compromise on. A good way to tell is if you are very passionate about something. It may be something that is too important to you to give up.

It is important to remember that some of the answers will change over time. We are searching for the things you think are “musts” or that you must have and are not willing to let go of. These are the issues that may become a conflict later on.

Home

Where do you live?
Who do you live with? Why?
Do you own a house? Do you have mortgage on it? If so, how much?
Is it important to you to have your own private home, or do you prefer apartment or condo living, where a management company is responsible for the maintenance?
Do you prefer urban, suburban, or rural settings?
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
What kind of furniture would you have in your ideal home?
Do you like coming home after a day of work?
Who takes care of the cleaning of your house?
Where is the center of your home? Bedroom, living area, kitchen…? Why?
Do you prefer big or small space?
If you had unlimited money, where would you live?
If you had unlimited money, how would you live?
Are you a do-it yourself kind of person, or would you prefer to hire professionals?
Are you a handy man/woman? What things would you be able to do at home?
How do you feel when people turn up unexpectedly at your home?
Is your door open or closed most of the day?
Do you like to be on your own in your house?
Do you have music playing in the background?
How many TV sets do you have? Where are they in the house? Why?
Do you have a TV in your bedroom?
Do you sleep with the TV or radio on?
Do you like dim lighting or a house full of light?
Do you like having fences between you and your neighbors or do you prefer open space so you can walk through each other’s yard?
What is your routine for cleaning the house? In the evening before bed, in the morning before work, after work, weekends, never, once a month…?
Who do you think is responsible for taking care of the house? The man or the women?

Food
What is your favorite food?
What is your favorite drink?
What is the food you most hate?
What are your childhood food memories?
What are your childhood food nightmares?
Is there any ethnic/cultural food you like eating?
If you go to a restaurant, what kind of a restaurant would it be?
Do you love eating?
Do you like cooking?
How much time would you dedicate to cooking dinner?
Do you have a sweet tooth?
Were you ever denied food as a punishment?
Were you ever given food as a prize?
Were you ever forced to eat?
Has someone in your family ever had a dysfunctional relationship with food?
When you are stressed what do you tend to eat/drink?
Do you eat most of your meals sitting down or do you eat on the run?
Do you watch TV/read book/talk on the phone while having a meal?
Do you set the table before a meal or do you eat out of the pot?
Do you plan your meals ahead or do you open the fridge and pick whatever you see?
What do you think of family dinners?
Do you follow a specific diet for religious, health, belief purposes?
Do you think everyone in the same house needs to follow the same diet?
What do you think about food and health?
Are you a coffee drinker? If so, how many cups do you drink?
Do you drink alcohol? If so, how much? On what occasions?
Are you adventurous with food?
What are the things you appreciate about your parents regarding food and eating?
What are the things you do not appreciate about your parents regarding food and eating?
Were you ashamed or proud of your home food?
What is the most luxurious food in your opinion?
Do you take food with you to work? If yes, why? If not, why not?
What is a reasonable price for meal in a restaurant in your opinion?
When you go to a restaurant, do you tend to go to familiar places or do you try new places you have never been before?
Is there any food you think you are addicted to?
What do you think needs to happen after dinner regarding clearing the table and cleaning, e.g. do you take turns or do it together?
Do you recall a time and situation when food or eating was a source of tension?

Telecommunication
What kind of mobile phone do you have?
How much money do you spend on your mobile phone service?
What kind of a computer do you have?
Do you buy the latest gadgets?
How much time do you spend on the phone every day?
Are you a technology type person or would you rather use pen and paper?
When you are not on the computer for work purposes, what do you use the computer for?
How much time do you spend on your computer every day? For work? For fun? For communication?
Do you play computer games? If so, what kind?
Do you buy things online? If so, what?
How much time do you spend on Facebook?
Have you ever shared personal things on Facebook?
Have you ever broken up with someone on Facebook or by SMS?
Do you have an unlisted telephone number? If yes, why?
Would you answer the phone, mobile, Skype while having dinner?
What is your opinion on friends/family calling late at night?
Will you be constantly connected to your mobile or email while on holidays, or do you feel comfortable disconnecting for a day or two?

Pets
Did you have a pet as a kid?
Are you an animal lover?
What animal would you prefer to have as a pet?
Do you consider pets members of your family?
Would you like to have pets in your home with your partner?
What would you do if you disagreed with your partner about what pet to have?
Do you believe it is appropriate to give up a pet if it creates conflict in your relationship?
Have you ever been jealous of a partner’s relationship with a pet?
How much money would you spend to take care of a pet?
Would you give up holidays and vacations if you could not find a place that accepts pets?
Would you feed your pet home food or bought animal appropriate food?

Join me next week for the next chapter of Know Your Partner about attitude towards culture, race, ethnicity, difference, truth and law, politics and community, media and religion.

Until then, merry marriage,
Ronit