Just in case you have never seen Ghost Whisperer, this is a TV series about a young woman who can see and talk to ghosts, and helps them cross over by getting closure. In each episode, Melinda is approached by a ghost and helps it communicate with loved ones, revisit places and events and find peace. Once the ghost has settled its affairs, it sees a beautiful bright light and happily walks towards it.
Now, we are all grown ups here and we know that TV series are not real. In fact, this particular one features things you are unlikely to find or do at home (not the least of which is Melinda’s incredibly patient and understanding husband and the absence of kids from their life, despite being married for so long). Still, there is something to be gained from everything in life, and Ghost Whisperer can teach us how to manage our emotions right now, or else get stuck in them.
I guess that in a sense, a life coach or a therapist is a kind of ghost whisperer people come to when they are still alive. Much like one, Melinda is typically very composed and puts her life aside, while she totally focuses on the “ghost du jour”. No matter how scary and horrible the ghost is to her, she always views it as a troubled soul, who would be really nice and positive, if only it could. This is exactly the mental position taken by a life coach or therapist while working with a client – totally calibrated around the client’s wellbeing.
In one powerful episode, Melinda discovers a horrible ghost aggressively protecting a house with 3 teen kids in it, supposedly keeping them captive there and controlling their every move. She believes this is the children’s father, described by their neighbor as an unpleasant and short tempered man, who died. However, while trying to rescue the kids from the ghost, they offer the strongest resistance and keep pushing her away. Eventually, she learns the ghost was actually the kids’ mother, who died and whose death has been hidden by her and the kids for several months.
In the end, the dead mother must go to the light, so Melinda needs to find someone to be the kids’ guardian, or they will be split up into foster homes. She finds the mother’s older sister, who refuses to take care of the kids, while the ghost bitterly says the same. But Melinda is very experienced in the closure business and quickly finds out the two sisters’ parents died when the kids’ mother was still under age, and her older sister refused to adopt her, sending her instead into foster care until she turned 18.
Naturally, any innocent viewer thinks, “Oh, how could she? What kind of a sister was she?”, but Melinda, as I have said before, is kind and always assumes the best. The older sister explains she was young and scared and thought that adults would take better care of her sister, and Melinda quickly suggests to both women to give the older sister a second chance.
Eventually, the aunt adopts the kids, the mother’s ghost helps her connect with them, happily vanishes in the light and Melinda has once again brought closure to a troubled soul (someone, get me some tissue, quick).
The good news for us is that we are still alive!
What this means is that we can do something about our emotional tangles and relationship conflicts and bring closure to them while we can enjoy the effects. Here is how to do this:
Find a quiet moment and a quiet place. Sit comfortably and take a few deep breaths.- Pretend you are Melinda Gordon, the Ghost Whisperer, but you are also a ghost, if you catch my drift. See yourself floating semi-transparently out of your sitting body, while your sitting body becomes an incredibly loving and compassionate person.
- As Melinda, ask the ghost about any thoughts and feelings in your life that get you stuck and create pressure (you can usually feel this in your stomach, in your head, your neck, your back or your jaw muscles).
- As the ghost, tell Melinda how you feel. You know she will be on your side, no matter what you say, so you are safe to reveal your most guarded secrets (in the real world, of course, everything will stay in your own mind, as long as you say nothing aloud).
- As Melinda, tell the ghost you are there to help, that everything it feels can be unraveled and that release and happiness are close at hand. In fact, just bringing things up helps a great deal, doesn’t it?
- Tell the ghost it deserves to be emotionally free and happy, being a well-intending human soul, looking only for peace of mind from temporary confusion. Tell your ghost it deserves a second chance, and a third, and a fourth and more.
- Let Melinda gently guide the ghost towards complete expression of everything that hurts, while offering kinder interpretations to accusations made towards others, because, after all, everyone is as well-intending, yet confused, human soul.
- As this happens, feel the tension leave your body and warm relaxation set in. Take another deep breath from time to time to help this to occur.
- When you are content, relaxed and happy, float back into your sitting body and reconnect the happy ghost with loving Melinda, turning back into yourself.
Find a quiet moment and a quiet place. Sit comfortably and take a few deep breaths.When you are done, please consider sharing your experience with everyone through the comment box below. Tell us as much or as little as you want, but help me inspire other readers get closure too.
Walk towards the light and be free,
Gal
