Recently, I discussed the concept of a parenting bible with a group of parents in my workshop. A bible, they all thought, was full of gems that everyone must follow. I told them that as soon as they argue about it, it is no longer a gem. I believe that in parenting, there is no “one and only one” bible and what is a rule of life for one parent may not be for another, so there is no point arguing about the rules.
Deciding what to do, what not to do and how to do thing in your life (in this case, in your parenting) depends greatly on your circumstances, your beliefs, values and needs and the destination of your life’s journey. There are no two people on Earth, not even twins, whose life circumstances, beliefs, values, needs and destination are identical. Therefore, we all need different sets of rules.
In parenting, this is even more so, because there are no two people that have the same circumstances, beliefs, values, needs, destination, as well as a relationship with the same person (with the same circumstances, beliefs, values, needs and destination) and the same kids (each with the same circumstances, beliefs, values, needs and destination). Can you see how complicated it is to fit a single set of rules to every parent?