Family Matters

It is common belief that teens have to finish school in order to succeed in life, but that is not true. Sometimes, leaving school is the best thing that happens to them. For example, I was kicked out of school at the end of grade 10 and it was the best thing that happened to me. It was a strong wake-up call. In the end, I became a teacher.

Applying for a parenting career requires no interviews and no application forms, though it is one of the most demanding and rewarding careers. Without the benefit of selection criteria, we discover that to be good parents, we need many skills and abilities that we do not learn at school. Some people hope that these skills will show up in the delivery room together with their first born. Others say you either have them or you don’t. I believe that the magic of pregnancy and childbirth is not enough to make us parents and we can and should develop these skills over time.

I have had this discussion many times and I think it is about time I write about it. I would like to be honest and say that I am a mother of three, I still flirt with my high school sweetheart and I am proud of it! In fact, I recommend this to all of you!

You are probably saying to yourself, “Of course you would recommend this to everyone. You are just trying to encourage herself.”

Is it OK or not? I will let you be the judge.

I had a chat with one of my clients, who was going through a very rough time. I was trying to help her choose a path and asked her, “What are you going to do?”

She was quiet on the phone for a while and then she said to me, “Ronit, you make it sound like I have a choice”.

I guess our lives are not lives of accepting what we have. It is more wanting what we do not have instead of appreciating what is in front of us. This is why we say “the grass is always greener on the other side” and most people cannot find the treasure that lies in their backyard (read The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho).

Did you know?

Children studying music from as early as grade 4 get to their first year of high school with an average academic score that is 11% higher than kids who did not study music.

If they continue their music studies into high school, by the time they graduate, their average academic score is 23% higher than kids who did not study music.

Handling money is something we all need long before we leave home. When friends have brand-name shoes or a computer game and your kid wants them too, your kid’s ability to understand money is going to be very handy. So if you wonder when it is the right time to learn about money, my answer is: the minute your kid can count to 10.

Children can be taught at a young age that money is their way to get the things they want in life. It is, after all, your way of getting the things you want in life.

Here is how…

Although suicide is not a topic many people talk about, I believe it is important to discuss it BEFORE it is too late. Whereas in the past suicide was an adult concern, the trends in the last 50 years have changed and more and more teens (aged 15 and above) are at risk.

There are many reasons for suicide, some of which are related to crisis and mental breakdowns due to the loss of loved ones and others events that cannot be prevented. However, the major reason for suicide is depression. Yet unlike losing someone you love, depression can be prevented!

Suicide is one of those things that when it happens, it is already too late. Therefore, we, as parents and educators (and government), must take responsibility and dedicate ourselves to preventing suicide.

I do not think there is such a thing as the “right age gap”. I believe that each family has its own “right gap”. There are two theories on this matter:

1. Have kids close together so they can grow together and be as close as possible socially. There is also a bit of “and let’s get the kids thing over with as quickly as we can and get on with our life” in this approach.

2. Have your children spaced out to allow them to be individuals and give yourself enough time to dedicate to each one of them.

Parents ask me: What is Dyslexia? What is the impact of having it? Will it limit my child’s success in life?

I have worked with many kids, who have had symptoms similar to dyslexia that were actually caused by other problems. Deafness, visual problems, temporary challenges with a second language, gaps in their education or emotional problems may appear like dyslexia but cannot be treated like dyslexia.

But with this learning difficulty come good things too.