I think this is the problem, associating pink with girls and blue with boys - which limits the boys and the girls.

I agree with you that boys and girls are programed differently but I think they are programed by our society to be different and I think that in some areas it is working well and others are not.

Whenever individuality is pushed to the side by generalisations it prevents children ( and grownups ) from being natural and following their own intuition and natural tendencies.
We have a problem in our society that if boys wants to do cooking or sing, they need to overcome their parents' stereotypical ideas about what is suitable for boys and girls.
When teenagers choose coursed or a path in high school that will lead them to a profession, they are highly influenced by what the society thinks is suitable. How many girl mechanics do you know? Why? do you really think that girls just don't have it? Did you know that in science and math subjects there are more boys than girls and that most sports teachers are male? So, no, we don't have to say things to program them to think that those things are feminine or masculine - we can go with them once to a toy shop for them to get the best social lesson of in life.
girls toys are pink, purple and all about caring for others, cleaning the house, babies and beauty. ( and only when they are teens and obsessed with the way they look we ask, "What have we done wrong?")
Boys toys are brown and black and are all about sport, monsters, cars,science and scary and aggressive acts ( ah, and if they do something in the house it is the outdoor of the house - fixing and garden)
I agree with you Jill, they are programed but without awareness we will sit on the stand in the parenting trial and lose.

Happy Parenting

Ronit
Parenting Classes

I am sure raising boys only is not the same as raising a mix from both genders.
I grew up in a family with 4 girls one boy and in my house there are two girls and one boy and the boy is the "Sandwich" kid. ( We gave the sandwich concept a different meaning).
kids are kids, and boys are also kids. some of them are rough, some of them are soft, some of them are creative, some of them are academic, some of them are more friendly than others and some prefers just a small group of friends.
I think if we treat them as individuals instead of putting them in a category of " all boys need..." we will give them the freedom to BE, instead of the pressure to fit.

Happy parenting
Ronit
Parenting Classes

What an awesome example of raising two sons that are totally different.
I am sure that allowing them to play with dolls gave them a permission to choose. Still, there is society around and very fast after going to a day care or school they "learn" what society thinks about what boys and what girls should do. Some of them are strong enough ( strong means have strong parents) to choose what suits them and what doesn't. Others just pick a role that is expected of them and take the risk of living an unfulfilled life.
When my son Tsoof was young, we kept guns from him for about 3 years. One day, a gift arrived by post to his third birthday. My sister sent him some toys to play with and as I opened it there was an Uzi gun in it, you know, the one that makes noises when you shoot. Gal and I looked at each other in terror. I was so upset with my sister. The second he saw it, he picked it up in excitement and pressed it. Every time I heard the sound of the shooting, I felt my heart was broken. I wanted to prevent him from this a bit longer. I knew I couldn't do it forever but hoped that at least for another year or two and then he took the gun and went to the wall, pressed it against the wall and was very excited with then noise it made. Then, he moved to another wall and pressed it against the wall again. Gal and I looked at each other shocked. He was so happy and excited and for about 15 minutes he moved from one wall to another and pressed it and then he said:
"Now I have a drill, just like dad's"

I love drills. They are very useful in the house.

Thanks Susan
Happy weekend
Ronit
Parenting Classes

Thank you so much for the link.
I hope many parents will visit it and learn more about gender.
I think we neglect to pay enough attention to the gender issue as our kids are young and later on we face many difficulties related to it.

Thanks and hugs
Ronit
Parenting Classes